If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
