I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
My dick has a subreddit
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
