I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I'm at about main and main street
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
