that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
