dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
