i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
