Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
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