HIV tests are more positive than that guy
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Randomize
