don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Randomize
