Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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