At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
