You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
