Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
