Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Randomize