She's JV to your varsity
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
