dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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