I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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