Do you still have your period?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
