Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
