So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize