you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Randomize
