Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
