we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Randomize
