Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
