I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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