Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Randomize