I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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