I have demons in me.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
