Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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