Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight