so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize