He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Shitshow foam night was such a success
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
