This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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