He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
