Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
