Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
