Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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