Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
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she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
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Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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