That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
