omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize