I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
