Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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