your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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