She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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