The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize