i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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