You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
