One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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