? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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