i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Randomize
